Way more than Cable
by Vanamo
Summary: Set during Season Four's episode 'Frozen'. House sends the ducklings to pester Cameron about getting him cable, but Thirteen quickly sees other opportunities.
1. Chapter 1

So it's not a New Year's Eve fiction, but I don't feel like recycling that old kiss at midnight idea. It's Camteen (because really, do you expect anything else?) I don't know how I feel about this story yet, it wasn't one of those lightbulb moments. Maybe 3-5 chapters, I'll keep playing with it. Happy 2010 everyone! Oh yeah, I stole plenty of lines from David Shore. After the mess he's created of season 6 I'm not apologizing.

* * *

"House wants us to spy on you, report back," Thirteen told Cameron with the two other ducklings stood beside her. She shoved her hands deep into her jean pockets as Cameron's eyes met hers, trying not to be intimidated, or worse blush, at blonde doctor's gaze.

Cameron leaned back and grinned, almost incredulously. "And you're telling me this because?" she asked with a bit of sarcasm.

"We don't want to do it," Kutner said flatly. Wrong, Thirteen thought, she just didn't want to be here. House was busy flirting with South Pole Doc and she doesn't really care about whether there was cable in the patient rooms. She did however care about Cameron, which is why she didn't want to bug her. House had a way of setting them on tasks she despised.

Cameron shrugged. "I don't see a problem so far."

"If our choice is between pissing House off or pissing you off, that's not much of a choice," Taub said coolly. Thirteen glared at him; who was he to speak the opinion for the whole group? If the short one was going to talk, he could at least get it across that House was the greater evil.

"So, unless I give House cable, you're going to make my life miserable," Cameron said to clarify.

"Yes," Thirteen said solemnly, nodding slightly.

Cameron nodded deeply in realization. "And you're telling me this so you won't feel as guilty when you do it," she stated, clutching the red folder in her hands.

Taub stole a quick glance at Thirteen. The brunette rocked back and forth slightly, her hands still feeling the lint in her left pocket. She would rather be at the South Pole right now. "Yes…"Taub finally admitted.

Cameron shrugged. "Accommodating House's every whim is not my job anymore," she said with distinct pleasure. She started to walk away.

"But," Taub said quickly, "it is ours." Cameron looked over her shoulder at him.

Kutner stepped up and crossed his arms. "House will get what he wants," he said. For once he actually looked like he could be intimidating, Thirteen thought. It was probably the fact that he was wearing nice shirt, which she could never remember him doing before. It was unbuttoned and over a pink shirt, House style. Yes, that had to be it. She resigned to concentrating on one of the stray pieces of hair hanging out of her low, loose ponytail that was bugging her.

Cameron gaped at him slightly, then grinned and pushed passed him back into the hustle and bustle of the ER, fully dismissing them. Thirteen rocked back and forth on the balls of her feet again, cursing silently. One of her few interactions with Cameron and it had been a disaster.

"Maybe we should just pay for it ourselves, tell him she folded," Taub suggested. Kutner hopelessly threw his hands up a bit, his wannabe House act failing, and they started to walk off. Thirteen rolled her eyes and reluctantly followed.

"Wait!" she heard Cameron call, along with a folder snapping shut, "No."

Thirteen and her fellow ducklings turned around inquisitively. Cameron met her eyes with a hint of mischief and Thirteen tried not to break into a smile. Maybe this little battle over cable would get interesting.

* * *

"I'm surprised that they actually bought it," Thirteen said casually.

Cameron looked up from her chart about a 55 year old obese man who decided that more Viagra meant that his wife might actually invite him back in bed. It was stupid really, considering that his wife had had knee surgery three weeks prior. He had fallen out of bed and conked his head. What he had been doing to cause the fall, Cameron _really_ didn't want to know. The glare his wife was giving him was enough. Their teenage son was looking around, very bored. "Bought what?" Cameron asked.

"That list of access codes you gave them to unlock the TVs," Thirteen told her. "Nice getting them to work for it by making them do your clinic hours."

"And why aren't you there helping them?" Cameron questioned as she dabbed the alcohol swab on the fat man's head.

"Because I'm not an idiot," she grinned. "You worked for House for three years. You don't play his games, you make dumber ducklings be the players."

"Is this relevant to my husband?" the woman asked curiously.

"No," Cameron said quickly. "Can we continue our conversation later, Thirteen?"

Thirteen shrugged, feeling much more at ease around Cameron than before. "Sure, I'll just grab a chart and get some actual work done."

"Thanks," Cameron said gratefully. Thirteen nodded and was soon obscured by the half closed curtain.

The man grabbed the blanket from the bet and used it to discreetly cover his waist. His wife's jaw dropped and she smacked his arm. The teenager snickered and managed to tell his mom that he was going to the cafeteria before also vanishing. Cameron rolled her eyes and concentrated on the wound. Viagra would be the death of mankind.

* * *

A few hours later, Cameron took a quick seat on a spare bed. She closed the curtain and eased her aching body down, staring up at the ceiling. The weather was still incredibly dreary this time of year, with fair numbers of accidents from slick roads and snowball fights that turned out to be ice balls. This latest grievance by House only added to her stress level. By tomorrow Taub and Kutner would be back with smug expressions and childish vengeance.

Thirteen wasn't all that bad though. She actually found her quite attractive, despite her mysteriousness. Or maybe it was her mysterious nature that made her so attractive? Either way, if House knew about it there would be endless mocking. Frankly she was too tired to address the issue further and threw her arm over her eyes. A two minute nap would be great right now.

The curtains flew open with an obnoxious screech from the rings on the metal rod around the bed. She groaned and closed her eyes tightly.

"Hey," she heard Chase's voice greet, along with a firm and on her shoulder. She let her arm fall limply to her side. Perfect, another conversation of walking on eggshells with her 'boyfriend' of however many months. "I was just wondering if you had plans for tonight?" he asked.

"Um, no, I don't," Cameron said. She sat up a bit. "Why?"

"My friend Mike has two hockey tickets for tonight, I was wondering if you wanted to go?" Chase asked.

Cameron's heart fell into her stomach. She hated hockey, and even if she thought it was more than one step above brutality, her impending headache would make itself known the entire time. "I'm not really in the mood," she told him. "I think I'd just rather spend a night at home."

"They're fifty dollar tickets!" Chase said, trying unsuccessfully to hide his disappointment. "Come on, Allison. We haven't gone out in awhile now."

"I have a headache, House is up to one of his schemes again and I just don't feel like dealing with things right now," Cameron said, rubbing her temples with her thumb and index finger.

"You don't feel like dealing with me?" Chase asked, raising his voice.

"That's not what I meant," Cameron answered tiredly. They had been together for eight months and had been fighting for about seven months, three weeks and six days.

"Fine," he said, "Whatever. I'll go with Nurse Gutierrez."

"My 5'3" part-time model Nurse Cindy Gutierrez?" Cameron asked, shocked.

"No, the 6'0" bodybuilder and hockey fan, Nurse _Ramon_ Gutierrez in Radiology," Chase clarified, his eyes narrowed, "but I suppose I could take Cindy instead."

Cameron glared at him, but she really didn't have the strength to do this whole 'you don't appreciate me enough' fight ritual with him again. "Do whatever you want, Chase," she said. "I'm going home."

He bit the inside of his cheek and spread his broad shoulders like a proud peacock. "Fine," Chase said. "I'll see you later."

He walked away before Cameron had the chance to say bye. She rolled her eyes and fell back onto the bed on her left side with her hands hanging off the side. He was handsome and charming, but could be such a whiny brat too. Most days she put up with it, she had even quit her job for him, but she continually questioned how much the relationship meant to her.

"Dr. Cameron?" a soft voice asked. She felt a soft hand on her shoulder and looked up to see Thirteen looking down at her with concern in her eyes. "Are you ok?" she asked.

Cameron was, to say the least, surprised. From Thirteen's tone she figured that she didn't look sickly or anything, but the mysterious woman looked sincere and caring. Even her grip on her shoulder, in contrast to Chase's firm large hand, was soft and kinder. "Yeah," Cameron finally said, "I'm fine. Long day, you know?"

Thirteen nodded knowingly and sat down in the chair next to the bed. Her legs extended and flowed up to the bend of her right arm on which her head rested. Cameron felt her heart skip a few beats. "I'm sorry House is making us give you grief like this. Hopefully he'll lose interest soon." Thirteen said with a tiny smirk at the last bit.

"Yes, we can pray," Cameron said, still lying down. Thirteen seemed amused by this. "In the mean time, what are we going to do?" she asked.

Thirteen's smirk grew. "We play his game. As far as he knows, we've been causing havoc all day for you. Just go to him tomorrow and tell him you resigned from the committee."

"And when he finds out I haven't?" Cameron questioned.

"One of the boys will have bought cable by then," Thirteen said confidently.

Not finding any flaws in Thirteen's plan, Cameron nodded. "Ok, makes sense. But since House is an evil genius, we should expect retaliation anyway."

"Trust me, this option is better. Unless you want me to start flipping over gurneys, put alcohol in the IVs and start stripping on the nurses' station," Thirteen said casually, leaning back in the chair.

"I'm sure House would like that," Cameron laughed. She was again surprised at how easily she interacted with the brunette.

"That's probably why he hired me," Thirteen grinned. There was a short pause before she said, "I'm going to head home."

Cameron's eyes widened in realization; she'd ridden in with Chase today. If he was going to the hockey game, "Um," she said, finally sitting up. "Would you mind giving me a ride?"

Thirteen's eyebrows shot up. "Are you sure you don't want to walk home in this lovely weather?" she asked.

Cameron grinned, "No, I'm not in the mood for a two mile long stroll through the freezing rain."

"Darn," Thirteen said sarcastically. "I suppose I could give you a ride. Meet me by the doors in fifteen minutes?"

"Sure," Cameron said. Thirteen and nodded and made to stand up. "Hey, Thirteen," Cameron said quickly.

"Hm?" Thirteen asked, stopping in midair with her hands still on the chair's arms.

"Thanks," she said with a smile, "For somehow making laugh after this killer day."

Thirteen nodded and smiled sweetly, "Anytime." She stood up and Cameron watched her black leather boots disappear under the curtain between the beds. She grinned to herself. Out of all the fellows, she thought that Thirteen would be the least likely that she could become friends with. And in one conversation she'd found out as much as House knew about the mysterious woman after months of prying. She couldn't help wanting to learn more. Her name would be a good start.

Meanwhile, House was leaning on the nurses' station pretending to read a newspaper. Every two seconds he looked up at the bed in front of him, or more specifically the curtain blocking it. He observed Cameron's tennis shoes springing into the bed, then Chase's loafers walking over. They tapped impatiently until he finally walked out thirty seconds later, looking irritated. What House saw next surprised him enough for him to put down the newspaper. Thirteen's black leather boots walked over confidently. He saw them trace a small pattern on the floor before sitting down and lounging against the tile. Next Cameron's tennis shoes made a reappearance and dangled off the floor. When Thirteen left, the tennis shoes swung like a five year olds before Cameron hopped down and also left the bed with a huge smile on her face.

House grinned. This definitely was about more than cable. He hobbled off towards the exit – he had a physical to do.

* * *

I should mention that Viagra man was inspired by my father. Lmao, he'll kill me if he ever reads that.


	2. Chapter 2

"Call off your dogs, House!" Cameron called as she walked up to him in the lobby. He turned around. "Your little helpers are interrogating my patients, swiping my charts, intercepting prescriptions." She shrugged casually, trying to remember all the lines Thirteen had thought up that were marginally better than stripping on the nurses' station.

House looked around. "Why would you think that I'm-"

"Because I'm not a moron! You had to be pulling the strings here!" Cameron said in an almost whining tone. "You think because they make me miserable I'm going to give you cable."

House pursed his lips in thought for a second. "Let's assume that's true," he said in his usual I'm-such-a-confident-ass tone, "and it certainly sounds like it might be. What're you going to do?"

"Nothing," Cameron said simply, unfolding a piece of paper in her hand. "I resigned from the budget committee. I only joined the committee to help the hospital; you made me a liability. I now have zero influence over the hospital's cable policy." She influenced each particular word, hoping it would stick in his head but also taking an absurd amount of pleasure saying them. She turned and left him standing there. By the time she was five feet away a huge grin was plastered on her face.

Victory was hers.

* * *

Thirteen, Kutner and Taub were all sitting in waiting room chairs in the hallway by the ER since they weren't assigned there and House hadn't called them back yet. They could have gone to the cafeteria but Taub and Kutner were too lazy to move. Kutner was just discussing his bets with his internet friends about the Super Bowl when House limped around the corner with a bunch of papers under his arm. "Well done," he sneered.

"It didn't work, there's nothing more that we can –"Taub started. Thirteen glared at him. It was true that their plan didn't work, but he could have done a lot more to help it.

"Put these up," House interrupted, handing each of them a few fliers. They all took them curiously.

"Free Rottweiler puppies; please call _after _eleven pm and _before_ five am? Is this Cameron's home number?" Kutner asked. Thirteen gaped at the flier. For the first time in years she had gotten a girl's number from a wonderful third party, saving her the trouble. Of course she hated that the party was House, and even more so that their plan had failed.

"I love a new puppy!" House said as he started tacking up fliers. "My last one was delicious, very tender."

"There's no point in torturing her," Taub said.

"If she can resign, she can un-resign. Go to DEFCON 1. Forget waiting for her to make a mistake, make her make one." House told them.

"You want us to sabotage another doctor, possibly _harm_ a patient, all so you can have cable?" Thirteen asked, not sure whether to be disappointed or outraged by his immaturity.

"Harm suggests permanent damage. Get her to screw up then fix it." House said, starting to limp away. "Oh, and this time don't tell her what you're gonna do before you do it." He made a few hand motions, enforcing his belief that they were third graders.

Taub and Kutner leaned back in their seats and sighed. Thirteen rolled her eyes and tore down the flier House had pinned on the bulletin board. "Come on, let's get back to the ER," she said. The men groaned and Thirteen shot them a look.

"Fine," Taub muttered. She was sure he said something like 'this is all pointless' under his breath.

"If we don't come up with another plan he's just going to keep having us run around in circles," Thirteen said.

"Yeah well whatever you're trying to prove with Cameron, I don't want to be involved." Taub said, catching her and Kutner off guard as they walked. "We need to worry about our own asses at the moment."

"You can do whatever you want," Thirteen shot back. "Meanwhile, I don't feel like sitting on my ass. We need a new plan."

Kutner nodded in agreement and Taub rolled his eyes. They had to create counterattack before House drove them all up the wall. This time, Thirteen knew that Cameron wouldn't be enough. It was time to call in the big guns.

* * *

"How's it going?" Cameron asked Thirteen, who was leaning against the nurses' station. She was a bit surprised to see her still here.

"It didn't work," Thirteen said dismally.

Cameron sighed. "How bad is it?"

"I recommend unplugging your phones tonight," Thirteen told her. Cameron shot her a very confused look, but decided not to ask. "Taub deserted us and Kutner is eating lunch with Wilson. Neither were very helpful in coming up with a new plan."

"What's House's brilliant new tactic?" Cameron questioned as they walked toward one of the beds.

"Make you mess up," Thirteen said. "Frankly I don't see how this also forces you to rejoin the committee. Then again, he also said specifically not to tell you, so –"

She stopped as Cameron pulled open the curtain. The teenage boy from yesterday was sitting on the gurney with very loose pants on, looking incredibly embarrassed. "Uh, hi," he said meekly.

"Hi," Cameron said slowly. She warily looked at the chart and her eyebrows shot up. Thirteen looked over her shoulder and bit her lip to stop from smirking.

"What seems to be the problem?" Thirteen asked.

The teen ran a hand over his gelled black hair. "Yesterday after I saw you two, um, while you were with my dad, I got kinda…fresh, cause, you know, you're both really hot?" Cameron's eyebrows perked up. Thirteen seemed more amused by the minute. "And uh, so I went to the bathroom and texted my buddy and he said, you know, work it off. But I've never…actually…uh…"

"Masturbated?" Cameron asked. It took all Thirteen had not to laugh. What fifteen year old boy hadn't stuck his hand down his pants?

"Yeah," he muttered. "I didn't wanna do it right then, so I thought about how gross my mom's knee scar looked. I looked it up online, how to do it, and got, um, all lock n load. But I figured, you know, with swine flu and all that I should be careful and…uh…"

Thirteen took the chart. "You put hand sanitizer on your penis?" she asked incredulously, knowing there was a huge smirk on her face. An orderly who had been walking by and drinking coffee spit it out as he passed and gaped at them.

The teen blushed furiously as Cameron shut the curtains. "Um, yeah, but it started getting red and kinda burning. And so I took some Gold Bond like I do for when I swim."

"And so what's the problem now?" Cameron questioned, crossing her arms. Thirteen rubbed the back of her heel with one foot.

"I'm still…um…" he pointed downward, "hard."

"How long have you maintained that erection?" Cameron asked, stepping forward.

"Four hours," he mumbled. He leaned over to try to hide it even more, but he only succeeded in looking like a turtle.

"Four hours?" Cameron asked incredulously. Thirteen's mouth hung slightly open.

"I wanted to make sure I got there… so I took some of my dad's Viagra," he said. "It really hurts."

"Do you remember how much the dosage was?" Thirteen asked quickly.

"100 mg," he squeaked. The boy looked about to cry.

"Ok, we need to drain the blood from your penis to prevent clots and get the drugs out of your system. Contrary to popular belief, Viagra doesn't increase libido for teens. There is no reason for you to need Viagra for another 40 years." Thirteen assured him. He nodded slightly, seeming to calm down a bit from her tone.

"Are you going to tell my parents?" he asked while Thirteen took his heart rate and BP.

"It's technically a medical emergency so we'll treat you, but you need to call one of them. Anything further requires consent because you're a minor," Cameron said, patting his shoulder. "Would mom or dad be easier?"

He laughed dryly, "Probably dad. Mom isn't supposed to be driving yet anyway."

"Ok, we'll give him a call and get you some… relief." Thirteen said. The teenager nodded and Cameron closed the curtain again. Both doctors shot each other smug looks. Thirteen watched as Cameron filled out the chart. At least her day wouldn't be boring.

* * *

With updates every now and then from Kutner or Wilson, Thirteen knew that cancer had been ruled out and now House was looking at autoimmune diseases. Apparently House was concerned about her and wouldn't agree with Foreman's dangerous test. Thirteen grinned at the thought of him somehow falling for the woman. But there was absolutely no chance that House would grow to love her, or much less get married and have a little Houseite with her. This was House, after all. If anything, it meant when he finally did cure her and call off their mission he'd be even more of a grump than usual.

"How's our sextasy boy?" she hear Cameron ask. She looked up from her patient, an old man with a hip fracture whose eyes went very wide, despite his pained expression.

"He'll be the next 40 year old virgin," Thirteen grinned. "I'm sorry, it looks like you'll need surgery to fix your hip," she told the man, who groaned.

"Oh he'll live," Cameron said with certainty, referring to their earlier boy. "An accident involving their junk is like a rite of passage for men. My older brother had one when he was eighteen, it was hilarious." She further explained with a smirk.

"What happened?" Thirteen asked. She turned to the old man. "Sir, are you on any drugs?"

The man cleared his throat. "Yes, let me see," he said, feeling around in his breast pocket. "My wife makes me keep a list. She says I forget them but she's always forgetting to check her lottery tickets, so who is she to judge, right?"

Thirteen took the list and quickly felt the throbbing beginning of a headache. He was on ten different medications, many of which could react with the usual pain relievers like Demerol or other narcotics. "Ok sir, we need to get these medicines to the anesthesiologists so they don't cross-react and then we'll get you into surgery."

"Ok, but can I call my wife first?" he asked. "It's her bingo night but I know she's out with her girlfriends. Really, it's always something; a sewing circle, or her bingo game or her book club. And she won't let me do anything!" He told them with such emphasis that he moved his hip and yelped.

"Try to stay still and focus on something else," Thirteen said. "Allison, what did your brother do?"

Cameron was slightly put off by the use of her first name. Thirteen winked and she realized that Thirteen was trying to distract the man from his pain as she hooked him up to an IV. "Oh, well like I said, it was hilarious," she started, remembering the incident. "Well he was eighteen, I was sixteen. He was planning to 'make love' to his girlfriend for the first time and he wanted it to be romantic for her. So he made me go out and get roses to throw petals all over the bed, along with candles and other stuff. I said that it'd just be nicer to give her flowers, but the doorbell rang and he shooed me away. What I didn't know at the time was that he'd stuck a small one down his pants for her to find. "

Thirteen grinned widely and the man chuckled, "Kids."

"Yeah," Cameron said, nodding. "They were going so fast that when she pulled off his pants, the rose moved and all the thorns stuck him."

The man burst out laughing and Thirteen ran a hand through her hair, shaking her head. The man hit the bed with his hand for emphasis, since it wouldn't be wise to slap his knee. Cameron smiled fondly and relished the memory.

"You didn't strip the roses?" Thirteen asked, trying not to laugh as hard as the patient, whose face was turning pink.

"I didn't know they needed to be!" Cameron exclaimed. Thirteen nodded in acknowledgement; this was true. "So I got to drive them to the ER. We were there until 1 am and my parents grounded him for a month, which was fine since he couldn't play lacrosse without irritating all the bandaging."

"Wow," Thirteen said, "That's just…wow." She chuckled.

"Martin!" A shrill voice called. Thirteen turned to see Cuddy and an older woman. The woman hobbled forward and slapped the man's arm. "Martin Van Buren, what in God's name were you thinking? Trying to shovel out the driveway by yourself, why didn't you make Abraham dig the station wagon out? He's taken over the basement; you might as well make the lazy bum work!"

"Hannah!" he whispered. "Not so loud."

Cuddy walked forward and crossed her arms. "Plenty of interesting patients today, huh?" she said while Hannah continued lecturing her husband.

"You can say that again," Cameron said, gripping the bed with one hand.

Thirteen nodded in agreement as a nurse finally came around to administer the man's pain meds. "Good thing he had that list of medications," Cuddy said. "We don't need another malpractice suit."

Thirteen's eyes widened in realization. She met Cameron's gaze and the light bulb seemed to go off in her head too. Thirteen turned to the dean. "Dr. Cuddy, could you do us a favor?"

* * *

Ok, finally an update. I feel so lazy right now, plus another idea hit me so I wasted a day on it (and it's not done). Whatever, the wait is over. I enjoyed this chapter emmensely. But now it's time to go back to school. nooo! :( Thanks to everyone who reads and reviews as always.


	3. Chapter 3

"How's your patient?" Cuddy asked. House and Foreman looked up from the breakfast selections in the cafeteria.

"She has an autoimmune disease," House said confidently. "Tell the psych department she's in denial."

Cuddy nodded and the guys went back to getting food. "I had to fire Cameron," she said, trying to use a believable tone.

Foreman's already large eyes widened. "What happened?" he asked, looking around to make sure nobody was listening.

"65 year old man came into the ER with a hip fracture," Cuddy explained, mentally going through the rehearsed lines. Thirteen had been clever in using their actual patient at the time, who was eager to help. "Cameron gave him Demerol. The guy was on an MAOI, he went into a hypertensive crisis."

"Is he gonna live?" Foreman questioned. House watched her, unreadable.

"Taub caught the error in time," Cuddy said. They had decided that Taub was the least conspicuous of the ducklings to be part of the plot. House looked down at his food. "If she had just admitted the mistake, maybe I could have just suspended her, but," she said, raising her voice as House limped to the baskets of snacks, "she's packing up, if you want to say good bye."

"Should be hearing from the South Pole in a few minutes," House said, selecting his bag of bland hospital crap.

"That's it?" Cuddy asked. She felt the uneasiness rising up in her stomach.

House placed his hand on the glass countertop and shrugged. "There's nothing to be done! She screwed up; she's got no one to blame but herself."

Cuddy stared at him for a second, taking her hand off the luminescent glass and patting it before walking off. As she left she felt her muscles tense; he knew. This is why she hated getting involved in her employees' plans, especially when the methods of their madness were directed at House. The poor ducklings still had their baby feathers, Mother Goose was not about to knock the Big Bad Wolf over the head with the story book for them.

"I've gotta go talk to Cameron!" Foreman said urgently.

House was tempted to roll his eyes. "Cuddy wouldn't can her for one screw up. If she did, she wouldn't come to me. And if she did, she wouldn't open with 'how's your patient'. And if she did-"

"Why would she lie?" Foreman asked.

"Timeless question," House said with his usual sarcasm. "In this case, she conspired with her coworkers to teach me that some things are more important than cable. And I'm going to have to teach them that they're wrong." He crabbed his Ruffles chips and started to limp to the check out.

Foreman followed with his salad. When the cashier looked up, House pointed to Foreman quickly. The other doctor sighed and dug out money from his wallet, hating his job more than ever on days when Wilson's money wasn't enough.

* * *

Thirteen met Cameron outside her office with 2 cups of coffee in her hands. She was debating whether or not to go in when Cameron opened the door.

"Hey," Cameron greeted with a tired smile, leaning against the doorframe.

"Morning," Thirteen replied. She quickly noted how worn out Cameron looked. "Did you get phone calls last night? I'm sorry; I thought I got most of the fliers down after House left."

Cameron grinned at the younger doctor's concern. "No, it wasn't that. Chase was just being…" she trailed off and sighed."We got in a fight."

Thirteen closed her eyes and nodded in understanding. "Do you want to talk about it?" she asked sincerely.

Cameron watched her shoes scuff the linoleum tiles a bit. "Yeah, if you wouldn't mind listening," she finally said. She was surprising herself; she didn't like bothering people with her problems. She wasn't the kind of person to spill everything to someone or cry on someone's shoulder. Thirteen definitely wasn't one to let her.

Thirteen shook her head quickly, "Not at all. Here, Kutner bought me coffee but it's not decaf," she said, holding up one of the cups. If it didn't happen to be true she may have brought Cameron coffee anyway. Luckily Kutner was incredibly forgetful of their coffee habits, even though it had been repeatedly established that she only drank decaf.

"Thanks," Cameron said gratefully, taking the coffee. "I was going to go to the cafeteria, but I didn't want to deal with the noise or people anyway." She felt Thirteen's fingertips brush hers and they both pulled back quickly.

"You haven't eaten breakfast yet?" Thirteen asked, raising an eyebrow. She admitted that most days she skipped the most important meal of the day, but at least she could blame it on House's erratic work hours. As head of the ER, Cameron needed that energy boost. "If you had paged me I would have brought you a bagel too."

This made Cameron smile. "I'll remember that," she said. She led Thirteen into the small office, which currently had a mini Mount Everest of charting on the desk for Cameron to sign off on. File cabinets were crammed in two corners and Cameron also somehow found room for a desk, office chair, a two person couch, and a coffee table. The couch looked well worn from innumerable nights of Cameron falling asleep on it. Thirteen vaguely wondered if she had slept on it last night too.

Cameron sunk down onto the couch tiredly and sipped the coffee. Thirteen took a seat next to her and crossed her legs, also occasionally taking a drink of her decaf. Cameron played with the lid for a few seconds before setting it down and leaning back on the leather cushions. She sighed again and met Thirteen's eyes. They were sincere and she wondered why she had never noticed this side of the young duckling before.

She took a deep breath and began. "I guess it started with the hockey game. He had these tickets and wanted to take me, but I was tired and turned him down. He got really mad, went to the game without me, and I assume had a few beers and crashed at his place. Then yesterday after we talked to Cuddy, he paged me to come to the locker room. We started talking, but the civility went right out the window. He kept implying that I didn't spend enough time with him. I said that just because I didn't like him spending the night all the time didn't mean I didn't feet attracted to him, but he was tired of it. And he kept using the words 'at this stage in our relationship'. It really bugged me, you know? I had no idea what he was talking about," Cameron explained. Near the end, her words felt weighted and hard to express.

She tried to swallow the small lump forming in her throat. "I felt trapped. We yelled some more and eventually I said that maybe he should leave. He took it the wrong way and said he'd be over to get his stuff tonight." She met Thirteen's gaze pleadingly. "I just have no idea what to do."

Thirteen bit the inside of her cheek. She set her coffee down on the table next to Cameron's, keeping eye contact the entire time. Slowly, she leaned forward and pulled the blonde doctor into a hug. Cameron hugged back, needing the contact. She clutched the itchy fabric of Thirteen's lab coat. Thirteen rubbed her back reassuringly while Cameron rested her forehead on Thirteen's shoulder. She resolved not to cry. Chase wasn't worth crying over.

"It sounds to me," Thirteen said softly, "like he didn't give you a chance to explain things. And you should never feel obligated to spend time with him or have sex unless you want to. People need their space. I know the feeling, my last girlfriend-"

"Girlfriend?" Cameron asked inquisitively.

Thirteen mentally smacked herself. "Um, yeah," she said, since there was no point in denying it, "I bat for both teams, if you will."

She felt Cameron nod against her shoulder. Thirteen still had her arms wrapped around her and she didn't feel Cameron tense up, so she assumed it was ok to continue. "My last girlfriend was really demanding. It was during House's elimination game. She wanted me at her place every night, but I was busy digging up graves and breaking into cars. She got sick of it and dumped me, but I was fine with that. She was attractive, but with people like that…no matter how much of yourself you give to them, it's never really enough. It's suffocating," she paused, "and sometimes time and routine just numbs things that used to be exciting. You end up resenting the person because they're tying you down."

Cameron sighed again. Thirteen made some good points. "He's just been after me for the better part of three years. After all of this…I'm just tired of it all."

Thirteen nodded. She leaned back against the couch arm, which was slightly more comfortable, and tucked one leg in so Cameron could lean on her. Thirteen was still worried because from the sight of her Cameron wasn't in good condition to practice, especially for something as demanding as the ER. "I'm not the best person when it comes to relationship advice, but I think maybe it would be for the best. He's what, at least 30? If he's not grown up by now, there's no point in waiting. You don't need the stress right now."

Cameron pulled out of the long hug. She rubbed her forehead with her fingers, but finally nodded. She met Thirteen's sweet eyes and felt herself relax. "You're right," she sighed, "Thank you, Thirteen. I really needed that."

Thirteen grinned and took a sip of her coffee, "Anytime. And you know, just because House calls me Thirteen doesn't mean you have to."

Cameron took a sip of her coffee and looked up sheepishly, "I actually don't know your real name."

Thirteen chuckled. "Remy," she said, "Remy Hadley."

"Remy," Cameron repeated, testing it out. It fit her perfectly. "Who else knows it?" she asked curiously.

"I'm sure House knows it," Thirteen said, "He did hire me after all. And Cuddy knows it, since she signs my paychecks. Foreman may know it just in case he ever feels the need to assert his authority over me."

Cameron laughed, "Yeah, that's something he'd do." She kicked off her shoes tiredly. "How busy was the ER?"

"Not too bad," Remy said. It had been getting rather busy again when she had walked through, but she didn't want Cameron to spring back up and work another exhausting shift. "Why don't you take a nap and I'll page you if things get out of hand?"

Cameron arched an eyebrow. "Come on," Remy said, grinning, "If House decides to check the ER, you being there kind of ruins it."

Cameron let out a deep sigh. "Oh fine," she said with a smirk, "on the condition that you go get me a bagel."

"Consider it done," Thirteen said, getting up from the couch. She'd go get it, even though Cameron would more than likely be asleep when she got back. In the mean time, she had to go talk to Cuddy and find her coworkers. On the very probable chance that House had seen right through their plan, they may be forced to make one more plan. Honestly, she was ready to just buy the damn cable.

* * *

Wow, I typed this whole chapter in one day after writing it all in class. Our education system is marvelous. Glad everyone is enjoying this, but really guys, nobody recognized the name Martin Van Buren? 8th American President? (ok, I suppose nonAmericans have a free pass) He only held like 5 different offices. Tsk tsk :) Anyway, on to more important matters. Who's in favor of Chase falling in a lake? *raises hand*


	4. Chapter 4

Thirteen made her way to the cafeteria to pick up the bagel for Cameron. Actually it was nearing eleven so it could be considered brunch. Her plan was to pick up the last of the really delicious breakfast bagels and warm it up in a microwave, and then on her way back find a decently warm blanket from a supply closet. It crossed her mind to steal a fun colorful one from Pediatrics, but she wouldn't sink to House's level.

"Thirteen," she heard Kutner call. She stopped applying the cream cheese mid-spread and turned around. Kutner waved her over to the table where he and Taub were sitting. They both had tall cups of coffee and the table was covered in various unfinished crosswords, newspapers, and ripped napkins full of hangman games. She wondered if this is what they had been up to in the past few days, since they certainly hadn't been in the clinic yesterday.

"Yeah?" she asked, wishing that she had remembered her coffee as Taub took a sip of his. It was currently making a circular stain on Cameron's table and getting cold. Cameron was either asleep on the couch or being her usual self and trying to fill out charts.

"I saw Cuddy, she said he knows," Kutner said with a disappointed sigh.

Thirteen groaned and took a seat, resting her chin on her fist. "What are we going to do?" she asked. Kutner shrugged and Taub leaned back in his chair, crossing his legs. She narrowed her eyes at the two of them. "Really, you guys have been sitting on your asses for the majority of the past three days. Help me out here."

Taub put down his crossword. "I heard Chase and Cameron broke up."

"What does that have to do with me?" Thirteen asked, quickly becoming annoyed. She silently cursed the gossip-spreading nurses.

Taub shrugged. "I'm just saying. This is why I'm staying out of it."

"The fact that Cameron and Chase broke up has nothing to do with me," Thirteen said sternly.

"I never said it did," Taub said, smirking.

Kutner looked between the two of them and a look of realization crossed his face when he saw Thirteen's eyes go wide and her cheeks turn pink. "So that's why House wanted us in the ER! Did she leave Chase for you? I didn't even know Cameron swung that way. Wait, do you swing that way? Is that why House hired you?"

Thirteen sighed heavily and rolled her eyes. "If you want me to answer a question, Kutner, you'll have to slow down enough so I can hear you."

"Is she-" Kutner started more slowly.

"No, Kutner!" Thirteen exclaimed. If she had coffee, she'd slam it. "I don't know why they broke up," she lied perfectly.

"You're avoiding the last two questions," Kutner said, trying to hide the smugness in his voice with another sip of his coffee.

"You two are pathetic," Thirteen muttered, stealing Taub's coffee. She took a long sip and bit into the bagel. She'd buy Cameron another one, or run out to Starbucks. Taub rolled his eyes and Kutner smirked. Before he had time to prod her further, they heard an unmistakable voice.

"You got Cameron fired!" House yelled as he limped toward their table.

"Uh, Cuddy wasn't supposed to find out," Taub stuttered, in turn stealing Kutner's coffee.

"No kidding!" House sneered. "Get me cable, how tough can that be? You cost a woman her job. There's only one thing you can say to keep me from firing you."

Thirteen looked down at her half eaten bagel. She was quickly getting another headache trying to keep all the various plans straight. "Cameron wasn't fired, we," she started. He's House, he'd figure it out anyway.

"Wrong!" House interjected loudly. Thirteen looked up at him in shock. Fuck, he already figured it out.

"You know?" Taub asked.

"And we're still fired?" Kutner asked, forking the last half of Thirteen's bagel.

"That should be a hint as to what you're supposed to say," House said obnoxiously, rolling his hand to egg them on.

"We're sorry," Taub said slowly.

"Wrong," House stated.

"I love you," Kutner said solemnly.

House looked up with his mouth slightly open. "Wrong," he said, somewhere between flabbergasted and appalled.

Thirteen shook her head. "This is a game?" she asked. "First we have to screw with our coworker, now we have to try and figure out what you want us to say? This is insane, I'm not playing," she said, throwing down her napkin and looking up at her soon to be former boss.

"Right," House said. Thirteen's lower lip dropped a bit. "You should have said this two days ago."

Kutner sighed and closed his eyes. "Do not play games with me," House continued, pacing in front of them. "Number one," he said, holding up his thumb, "you are going to lose, you're just not ready," he sneered patronizingly. "Number two, the game was to force you to stop playing games! I need you to stand up to me, challenge me! I need you to stop worry about getting fired!"

The ducklings looked up at him through his fiery lecture, effectively feeling like six year olds again. "Go pay for my cable," House finished, turning and limping off.

"No!" Kutner said loudly, proving this point.

House turned around and sighed. "I didn't mean on this," he said contemptuously. Kutner looked down at the table again. "Seriously, I need cable." House said.

Taub sighed and looked at Thirteen. The brunette smirked and stood up. "Have fun coughing up $29.95 a month," she said lightly. Kutner ripped off a chunk of the bagel. Finally, the world was somewhat back in order. Now there was only Cameron to attend to.

She stopped in her tracks. The usual cafeteria tray was empty, save a few crumbs. She groaned and mentally tried to decide between taking an early lunch break to go to Starbucks and trying her luck in the doctor's lounge.

Down the hallway, House munched happily on a bagel smeared with grape jelly. The battle for cable was over, but apparently a certain blonde ER doc's heart was up for grabs.

* * *

Thirteen walked into Cameron's office for the second time that day. The hunt for another bagel or anything remotely decent was hopeless, so half an hour after she first set out, she returned with sore feet and a colorful blanket dusted off from high on a shelf full of butterflies, bees, and other brightly colored creepy-crawlies. She closed the door silently behind her and found Cameron laying on the couch with her eyes closed and a folder on her lap. Judging from where the pen had been dropped, she had hardly made it past the patient's name. Thirteen sighed and shook her head. She carefully removed the folder and draped the blanket over Cameron's scrub-clad figure.

Satisfied that Cameron was warm and asleep, Thirteen rolled the chair over next to the couch. Next she grabbed a moderate stack of folders and kicked off her heels. She took a test sip of her old coffee and grimaced. It was disgusting, but she'd live. Picking up the top red chart, she began the dull task of reading endless patient data.

After about half an hour, Thirteen was beyond bored. She was about to resort to playing tic-tac-toe against herself when she heard Cameron's breathing change. Quickly looking up, she smiled when she saw Cameron's limbs stretch under the blanket like a kitten's. She opened her eyes slowly and rolled onto her side to face Thirteen.

"Morning, sleepyhead," Thirteen said in a soft sing-song voice.

Cameron grinned. "Technically it's afternoon," she replied groggily, pointing at the clock behind Thirteen. Indeed, it was just past twelve. It was good to know that she wasn't the only person who could be a smartass only five seconds after waking up.

"Enjoy your nap?" Thirteen asked, closing the chart.

Cameron nodded as she pushed herself up and stretched her arms above her head. Her scrub top rode up and revealed just a sliver of her creamy skin. Thirteen quickly opened the chart again and concentrated on lacerations on a 35 year old from a car crash.

"Are you doing my charting?" Cameron asked incredulously, kicking the blanket to the end of the couch.

"Partially," Thirteen said. "I thought about signing off on the boring stuff, but Cuddy would have my ass." She flipped the folder around and showed Cameron the small check marks in the corners. "As the car dealers say, just sign and drive."

Cameron chuckled. "How did the plan work out?"

Thirteen shrugged. "It didn't. It seems like he's known all along. The boys are buying the cable. So, as usual, House prevails." She mockingly punched the air above her head in victory in a very House-like moment.

Cameron smirked and crossed her legs, resting her feet on the coffee table. "So why are you still here?" she asked, "Doing my charting no less."

Thirteen moved the pen tip that had previously been resting on her bottom lip and looked up, smiling. "If you want, I can stop doing your charting."

"No!" Cameron said quickly, "I may employ you down here if it means less broken arms and car crashes to read about." She put her hands behind her head in relaxation.

Thirteen grinned. "If you teach me to forge your signature that may work out," she said charmingly. She handed the chart to Cameron, "Come on, pretend you're giving autographs."

Cameron shook her head and laughed as she signed on the bottom. "If either of us were famous enough to be giving out autographs, we'd hire people to do charting. And pay for House's cable."

"You're right, I should page Taub and Kutner," Thirteen replied, taking the next chart. "I swear they haven't filled out a single one since we were hired."

"Foreman and Chase never lifted a finger either," Cameron sighed. "I'm not on House's team anymore, but I have more paperwork than ever."

"You could just sign off on all of them without reading," Thirteen supplied, though she doubted that Cameron would.

Cameron let out a little dry laugh. "And what happens when you guys destroy the ER for real on a chart I signed off on? I prefer to keep my license."

"I don't see how House manages to keep his," Thirteen said. She passed the chart off. "Just a baby with pneumonia, now controlled. Sign on the X."

"Poor kid," Cameron commented. Between each chart there was a small pocket of comfortable silence. "I don't know how he does it, which is why I left before mine got yanked. Of course, there have been times when I was more worried about being arrested than whether I could get a job."

Thirteen nodded. "Ducklings wanted, requirements include eight years of medical school, burglary experience, and a strong disposition to putting up with a maniacal, narcissistic genius. Those with set in stone morals need not apply."

Cameron couldn't help but laugh. "You have to admit, that'd make for a catchy ad in the classifieds."

Thirteen smiled as she handed Cameron the next chart. She couldn't help but love the sound of her laugh and the way it seemed to resonate in the tiny office. She mentally told herself to snap out of it. Cameron had just broken up with her boyfriend, and because of said boyfriend she was more than likely straight.

"Yup," Thirteen replied. "If only the pay was better. And the hours, and the boss."

"But think of how much fun you have with your coworkers," Cameron said, grinning. Slowly but surely they were accumulating a done pile of charts.

"Actually, besides digging up that grave, this is the most fun I've had since I started working here." Thirteen said, handing Cameron another chart.

Cameron took it and felt her fingers brush Thirteen's for the second time that day. Thirteen didn't let go right away, and Cameron could feel the tension that lasted for only a fraction of a second. She released a breath she'd been subconsciously holding before composing herself. "So that's what you guys were doing," she said smugly. "Well anytime you want to do my charting, feel free."

Thirteen grinned. "It's not the charting," she said, smacking Cameron's hand with the next folder.

Cameron took the folder and held it in midair. "Well if it's not the charting, are you busy Friday night?"

Thirteen froze. Her fingers still held the textured plastic of the folder, that's all she was able to be certain of in the world flipped upside down in the course of three seconds.

"What?" she finally asked in a hesitated tone.

"Friday night," Cameron repeated. "People sometimes go out with each other. Traditionally it's something enjoyable, like a movie, and if their date wants a kiss afterwards they usually buy or make dinner."

"You're asking me to take you out on a date?" Thirteen asked. She was ready for someone to drop the mountain of folders next to her ear so she would wake up.

Cameron shrugged. "Chase's ship sailed months ago, and one thing I learned from House is to be observant. So if you're free, I'm sure there are some good movies out."

Still a bit stunned, Thirteen nodded. "I'd like that," she said, finally managing a smile. She dropped her hand and Cameron took the folder.

There was silence for a moment while Thirteen digested the situation. "Wait," she suddenly said. Cameron looked up in question. "Does this mean if I make you dinner, I get a kiss?"

Cameron closed her eyes and let a smile creep up on her face. "Only if it's a good movie."

"I've read that In Bruges has some great dark humor," Thirteen said. "It opens Friday."

"Perfect," Cameron grinned. Thirteen handed her another folder like before, but she felt the air between them change. She didn't know how to describe it, but it was enjoyable.

The buzzing of a pager filled the room. Both women jumped, causing Cameron to drop the folder. Thirteen checked her pager and sighed. "I'm officially off cable duty. Our patient is in a coma."

* * *

Ok, slightly more awake now. I was up til 3 writing an essay on top of writing this chapter yesterday, it was insane. In regards to reviews, a lot of people liked caring Thirteen. I was surprised because I always think of Thirteen has caring, because her love for Cameron is so deep, right? :) My weekend will be pretty hectic but I'll try to be better about updating. Not sure if the last chapter will be the last one or if I'll go for one more. Of course who give this a read oveprops to the folks r and catch my stupid mistakes. Thank you everyone for reviewing, here's your reminder of how much you all rock.


	5. Chapter 5

"South Pole Doc is out of her coma," House said, holding his leg. "And now we have a new symptom, increased intracranial pressure."

Thirteen leaned against the wall outside the DDX room. House was sitting on one of the green benches, surrounded by herself, Taub, Kutner, and Foreman. The good news, obviously, was that the patient was out of her coma thanks by a mechanic who took a drill to her skull. They ought to give him a license. Now they were getting down to the actual diagnosing.

"Why are we out here?" Kutner asked, putting his hands in his pockets.

House motioned to the DDX room with his cane. "That's the patient room." Kutner turned around, confused. "ICP plus kidney problems plus lung collapse equals…" House continued in a tone expecting suggestions.

"Most likely suspect is a tumor throwing off clots," Taub said with his hand on his hips.

"We ruled out cancer," Foreman interrupted. He was leaning against the wall on the other side of House with his arms crossed. Thirteen looked down at the floor, hoping to clear her mind enough to come up with an idea.

"But not clots," House said, popping open his vicodin. "What causes blood clots?" he asked before throwing the pills in his mouth and dry swallowing.

"Bacterial Endocarditis," Thirteen suggested.

"Not without a fever," Foreman said in his annoying authoritative voice.

"Deep vein thrombosis plus an existing PFO?" Taub threw in.

"PFO would have been discovered in her pre-South pole exam," House shot it down. He put the pills back in his pocket and stared at the glass walls in thought.

"What if the clots aren't clots?" Kutner said. Everyone turned to look at him. "Atherosclerosis, fatty plaque builds up on the arterial walls; pieces break off, block blood flow. Explains everything," he continued, shrugging a bit.

"She has zero risk factors," House ridiculed. "Forget fat, think clots."

"No!" Kutner said sternly.

House looked up and engaged him in a staring contest for a few seconds. "You're standing up to me?" House guessed sarcastically.

"Maybe," Kutner answered, nodding his head to the side.

Thirteen stared at him in intrigue before looking down at House. "Just to clarify, you should do that when you're right," House said belittlingly, "Sorry for the confusion." Kutner sighed as House continued, "How could a clot-?"

"Could be a different kind of fat, fat emboli," Kutner explained, fighting for his case. Taub scratched his forehead in thought.

"It's a perfect fit," House said, "Except it's completely impossible!" Kutner clenched his jaw. "Fat emboli requires an unrepaired bone breakage, between the X-ray and the exam I've seen her entire…" House paused. His eyes narrowed momentarily and he blinked, looking back up at Kutner. He pointed to him and said, "See that's what I'm talking about!"

Kutner nodded proudly.

* * *

Thirteen walked into Cameron's office confidently a few minutes later. Cameron looked up from her position on the couch and smiled at her, setting aside her charting.

"That was fast," Cameron commented.

Thirteen nodded. "Another case solved, surprisingly by Kutner."

"What did she have?" Cameron asked. She took a large stack of completed files off the couch to make room for Thirteen to sit next to her. Thirteen happily took off her shoes and sat down with her knees almost hugging her body, so she could hold the folder without her hands. Cameron sat with her legs crossed in a more comfortable position.

"A broken toe," Thirteen said as she took a chart from the slowly diminishing pile. Cameron quirked an eyebrow. "Fat emboli leaked from the unrepaired break."

Cameron nodded in realization. "Wait, Kutner came up with that?"

Thirteen grinned. "I guess House wasn't an idiot for hiring him after all. Although it's much funnier when he screws up," she said. She uncapped her pen and quickly set to work on reading the chart.

"True," Cameron agreed. She watched a little crease form in Thirteen's brow as she read the chart. "So House just let you all go?"

Thirteen checked the corner and handed it to Cameron. "Foreman and House delivered the diagnosis. Foreman is doing all the charting since we weren't there and Kutner absolved from clinic duty for his victory. He could have finished House's hours if he had bothered to work in the past two days, but now Taub is stuck with the clinic duty and the cable."

Cameron grinned and threw the chart onto the stack. "Well now you're free to help me for the rest of the week."

Thirteen returned the smile and took the next folder. A brief silence passed over them where they chose to speak in lingering glances and brushing fingers. Cameron felt her toes curl into the couch cushion.

"He likes her," Thirteen said randomly.

Cameron's head shot up. "Who likes who?" she asked curiously.

"House," the brunette clarified. "I think he likes the South Pole Doc. From what Foreman said, he's seen her naked too."

Cameron rolled her eyes. "Why am I not surprised?"

"He did a physical on her," Thirteen said, "in his apartment."

"Wow," Cameron said. "She works here right? Do you think there's a chance they'll get together when she gets back?"

"I heard she was into the mechanic, but you never know," Thirteen shrugged. She looked up and met her eyes, smirking. "We have to remember, it's House."

Cameron grinned. "You're right, no chance."

"I'm sure that's what everyone thought about you and me," Thirteen added quietly. She rested her head on her hand with her arm resting on the sofa's back.

Cameron leaned forward and took the chart on Thirteen's knees, bringing her face very close. "You'd better not let House find out that the mysterious Thirteen is such a softie," she whispered. Thirteen unconsciously widened her legs so Cameron could lean in further.

"Only around pretty girls," Thirteen said, coyly tilting her head to the side.

Cameron smirked. Baiting her wouldn't work. "Now that sounds like House."

A knock on the door suddenly interrupted the moment. Cameron and Thirteen simultaneously groaned. The knocking persisted and Thirteen was the first one to swing her legs off the couch.

House stood there smugly, swinging his cane which had obviously been doing the knocking. Thirteen rolled her eyes and stood in the doorframe, waiting for whatever he had to say.

He looked her up and down before concluding, "You're clothes aren't nearly wrinkled enough."

Thirteen rolled her eyes. "I'm not having sex with Cameron," _yet, _she added in her head, biting her cheek to keep her annoyed frown from turning into a smirk.

"I never said you were," House said with satisfaction. Damn, that was the second time she'd fallen for it. "No shoes, very interesting."

"It's what you were thinking," she said with another annoyed sigh. "I'm helping her with charting. What do you want, House?"

House studied her for a minute. She raised a questioning eyebrow. "Good for you," he said.

She was shocked for a fraction of a second, but before she let it show she squinted a bit at his pupils, checking to make sure the vicodin wasn't making him delusional.

House whacked her shin with the butt of his cane. "Ow!" she gasped. "What was that for?"

"Daddy's seal of approval," he quipped, "and the first of your many bruises and love bites tonight. If you don't show up tomorrow that's fine, I'll need the time to make the cards."

"What cards?" Thirteen asked, really wanting to kick his bad leg back.

"Valentine's Day, of course!" he exclaimed. "Wilson has a girlfriend, you have a girlfriend, I'm sure Cuddy's been sexually repressed enough to get a girlfriend. It's perfect."

Thirteen nodded in understanding. "And you have South Pole Doc. Look at that, everyone's happy."

He glared at her, unreadable. She grinned; she had the upper hand again. "Anything else?" she asked challengingly.

He pretended to think for a moment, moving his lip from side to side. "Nope," he resolutely said. "Just give me notice for when I should turn on the hidden cameras. I'd prefer if you use the janitor's closet, that one has high-def."

Thirteen grinned and nodded. "Bye House," she said before closing the door. She heard his cane going down the hall a minute later and turned back to Cameron.

The blonde doctor shut the folder on her lap. "We're done," she said content sigh.

Thirteen surveyed the obnoxiously large pile of folders on and around the table and smiled. "Does that mean you're ready to go?" she asked tentatively.

Cameron nodded and stood up, "I think so."

Thirteen smiled as she watched Cameron slip on her shoes. She thought back to how many times she had smiled in the past few days. She stepped into her own shoes and helped Cameron stand up but extending her hand. Cameron smiled back at her, and she concluded that she liked it.

* * *

"Sold out?" Thirteen asked the ticket manager for at least the third time.

"I'm sorry," the teenage cashier said, "but its opening night and we're out of seats."

Thirteen sighed and ran her hand through her hair, a habit of hers when she was frustrated. It only messed it up further since it was already windblown from the short walk to the theater in the bitter New Jersey winter.

"It's ok," Cameron said sweetly, holding Thirteen's arm. "This just means we can go straight to the dinner." She had been looking forward to the movie, but it wasn't a total buzz kill if they didn't catch it tonight.

"I only had enough money for the movie," Thirteen said honestly. It came out as a sulking grumble. "I'm sorry, I'm usually a much better first date."

"It's ok," Cameron said again. "I'm still enjoying it."

Thirteen sighed and stuck her hands in her pockets as they walked out of the crowded theater. "Is there any particular place you want to go?"

"We could go to your place," she said. Thirteen's eyes widened. "You can cook me dinner," Cameron clarified. "We'll see about whatever you had in mind."

Thirteen grinned, "How about a gourmet Italian dish, straight from Pizza Hut?"

"Sound G-ah!" Cameron shouted as her foot slipped on some black ice. Thirteen caught her seconds before she hit the pavement and pulled her close. The position was awkward for Cameron's back so after their eyes met Thirteen quickly helped her stand back up on her own two feet.

"You just can't get away from the ER, can you?" Thirteen said. She took one of Cameron's hands and held it firm but gently as they walked across the street to Thirteen's car.

"As I was saying, that sounds good," Cameron finished as a blush crept over her cheeks.

They both got into the car and Thirteen pressed her hand to the heated vent before brushing a stray hair out of Cameron's face. "Good," Thirteen agreed softly.

* * *

"Not delivering?" Thirteen nearly shouted into the phone. "You're Pizza Hut! There's not even that much snow on the roads!" She listened for a few more seconds before hanging up in a huff. Cameron was surprised that she didn't throw the cell phone. "Sorry, again," Thirteen said, disheartened.

"It's ok," Cameron replied. Honestly she was beginning to find it pretty amusing. "As long as you can use a microwave, we're fine."

"It's about the only thing I know how to use," Thirteen said.

"Same here," Cameron nodded as Thirteen looked through her freezer for anything edible. The blonde took a seat on the arm of the couch. She looked around the place curiously. It was spacious and modern. The high windows gave it an airy and free feel. Currently, they gave a view to the light snow that had been falling off and on all day.

"Ok, I found something," Thirteen called from the kitchen. Her head was currently blocked by an open cabinet door.

"I'm not picky," Cameron said. Thirteen started preparing the food, taking out bowls and placing them in the microwave. Next she took out a carrot and some celery. After a moment of watching her try to skewer a carrot, she stood up and walked over to the kitchen. "Here, let me help."

"I can do it," Thirteen quickly said.

"Mhm," Cameron nodded with plenty of sarcasm in her tone. She came around behind Thirteen and took the knife wielding hand in hers. "Well for starters, you need something better than a butter knife."

Thirteen blushed. "This is why I don't cook."

After a bit of searching, Cameron took the utility knife out of a drawer and placed it in Thirteen's hand. "Ok, you chop them like this," Cameron said under her breath, putting pressure on Thirteen's hand to help her chop them into slices. "This would work better if you were shorter," she chuckled.

Thirteen bent her knees so she was the same height as Cameron. Cameron laughed and they continued chopping. "I'm buying baby carrots next time," Thirteen said.

"You'll get the hang of it," Cameron assured her. After a few more seconds of watching Thirteen struggle, she took the knife away from her. "For now it's probably safer if I do it."

The microwave beeped and Thirteen carefully took out the two bowls. "It'd be easier if the soup came with vegetables in it," she muttered. She took a look in her bread basket and grinned. "This bread only takes a minute to heat up."

"Great," Cameron said as she slid the carrots off the knife into each bowl. Chicken soup and toasted bread – you would think that two grown doctors could do better.

A few minutes later, they settled on the couch with their hard earned meal. "This is actually pretty good," Cameron told her as she ate a few bites.

Thirteen grinned. "Ok, as long as the cable isn't –"she clicked the remote, "– out." Both women sighed.

"At least we have food," Cameron said.

Before Cameron realized what she was doing, Thirteen pulled her into a soft kiss. They parted and Thirteen smiled."It's fine. It was never about cable anyway."

* * *

Finished, literally 5 seconds ago, so unedited whatsoever for your convenience. Yes, that's it :( You'll live, I'll have something else soon enough. Sorry I couldn't get this up sooner, things have been fairly dramatic lately, here and in rl. Big round of applause for WonderousPlaceForAnEcho for reading this over for me. And I'm sure the others that I usually give credit to helped in some way ;) And as always thanks for reading and reviewing my little minions :) Questions, comments, bring them to the front desk (reviews or PMs) as usual. Any resounding 'nooo's!' will be patted on the head and put in the ward until their next Camteen fix.


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